Buffet People

3 Apr

I don’t understand buffet people. Walking around with a pile of food on a plate like a little pyramid, gazing at row after row of piles of stuff through a sneeze guard, having food put in “bars” (a sundae bar, a potato bar, a taco bar). The odd inclination to pile as much food as possible onto one plate. The pot of soup that is always somewhere that nobody ever touches.

It’s that more-more-more side of food. The glutton in all of us it calls to. I’m not blaming people for having trouble with diets or anything, but the buffet–that’s a world of its own. Ever notice how they’re all a little darker? How the tables are fake wood? How the floors are always sticky? The plates on that little bouncy plate holder thing? Even worse are the pizza buffets where the place is bright red and there’s lights just glaring down on all the large people eating plate after plate of mediocre pizza.

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